Yesterday in haste I wrote a quick post about Adam Goldstein (DJ AM). After a day of sharing stories, talking to friends, getting on stage to DJ and bawling my eyes out 2 songs into my set – I’m beginning to realize the amount of impact he had on this world. I’m gonna write about one of my heroes and one of the best people I’ve ever known. If you come here for youtube vids and fail gifs you can keep it movin this might come off as a downer, but I wanna do my part to make sure all of you people get some insight into the person he was not the celebrity you’ll hear about from TMZ or whatever other shit media source is looking to cash in on all of this.

First of all Adam was the best DJ I’ve ever known. Period. Every interview I’ve ever done has asked me who my favorite DJs are and I’ve always talked about how phenomenal he was. DJing – like a lot of modern art has changed drastically, it’s relatively easy to be a “good dj.” Play the right songs and stay out of the way, and you’re a “good DJ.” Make some waveforms line up on a screen and you’re a “good dj.” Anyone who ever saw AM play walked away completely blown away. He was a PHENOMENAL DJ. Seventeen year old girls with fake IDs and no knowledge of any dj culture would stop me and say “Oh my god he’s so good at that wicky wicky thing.” Yes his turntablist skills were unreal, and his song selection and ear for new music was just as amazing. Without going into DJ nerd detail, that’s almost impossible to find. It’s kinda like those dudes at guitar center that can shred and play any dragonforce song but can’t seem to write anything simple enough to catch the ear of the casual music fan. Their is a happy medium that is so difficult to reach in all music but in the nightclub world it’s even more tricky. To be so technically sound that you can make any arrangement of songs work fluidly, to have an ear that allows you to predict whats next and at the same time have the restraint and class to realize it’s not about you it’s about the people on the dancefloor. AM did it all better than any of us, that’s why he was on top and no one was even close.

That said as impressive as he was on the decks he was 10 times as gifted as a human being. I’m just gonna take a second to talk about how important he was to me personally.

Something happened in April of 2006 that would change DJ Culture in the USA forever. Daft Punk played Coachella and it was like nightlife in Los Angeles turned on it’s head. I was casually DJing at the time and far more concerned with my graphic design jobs. At the time I was playing friends backyard parties and beating them over the head with Roule’ Records, Ed Banger, Indie rock and stuff I had downloaded from Stereogum haha. I had been booked at clubs a few times and usually got the “We don’t play techno here” talk after one or two house records. I generally wasn’t asked to come back and that was fine by me. However after that magical Daft Punk show I was getting asked to play all over, people were all of a sudden into “house” and a lot of the DJs who were killing the local LA clubs were really uncomfortable about it. They primarily came from a hip hop background and were irate some newjack in tight jeans was coming in and taking money out of their pockets. Most of of my friends said fuck it stuck to their guns and did their own indie thing – threw their own parties, for their own friends and that was that. I was passionate about being able to play everywhere, I wanted to be able to rock those top 40 spots and I made it a point to get the records that these top 40 people liked. None of the DJs that were holding those gigs did anything to help me, which makes sense why would they want me taking their gigs? That was of course until I met the biggest DJ of them all.

DJ AM went out of his way to teach me things that he didn’t have to, he showed genuine interest in the records I was playing and would ask me to send him songs and would reciprocate with songs he knew would help me in my sets in “top 40″ club land. It was invaluable help and it looked crazy to everyone around him I’m sure. Why would he help someone like me get into the rooms he was booking and spinning at? Because he genuinely wanted better music in nightclubs and he recognized there was a chance to have people all over LA get into a bunch of great new records because of all the buzz “electro” was causing post Daft Punk coachella.

At this point our relationship was pretty surface, we were DJ buds but I was still floored. This dude who’s like the biggest deal in DJing is helping me? Fucking amazing. That’s when through some casual talk I realized he was sober, I’ve never drank or smoked in my life and being that I was straight edge I instantly had another quality to look up to. His ability to dominate a nightlife world sober was so impressive to me. You have to realize most of the business relationships people form in this world are formed through a line of coke or a night shared getting “fucked up.”

Then through mutual friends like Eamon, Pase, Eli, Christy, Lauren H, Mike B and countless others Adam and I began to share more and more experiences that showed how class he was. We’d go on hikes up Runyon canyon and talk for hours about everything, whenever I’d have questions or concerns about anything he’d have the right answer. Whether it was girls, djing, career stuff whatever it seemed like he had been there before and knew the right way to go about it. He was so intelligent and was so observant, I can’t even articulate how many times he’d tell me what was next, we’d debate about it, and then sure enough it would come to fruition. Such a legend.

Because addiction and speaking about drugs was such a big part of his life, we’d often talk about the disease that addiction is. We all have people in our lives who battle with addiction but I never understood the disease until I began talking to Adam. It’s such a demon that you can never escape. No one is ever healed of the disease and I know he battled it everyday. The fact that he took so much time out of his life to make sure people didn’t have to deal with the pain he encountered daily was amazing to me. He would do everything in his power to make sure many of our mutual friends got to AA and were dedicated to getting better. I’m talking endless phonecalls at 4am begging someone not to use. It was so difficult for him to be around drugs and I know that doin the intervention program for MTV must have been incredibly hard. But that was Adam, constantly throwing himself into the fire in the name of saving someone else.

The day after has been a day surrounded by memories of him, someone who went out of his way to help everyone around him. Someone who would show up to my monday night party jump up and down and run to the booth and ask me what song I was playing. You know what kind of feeling that is for a 23 year old kid who has dreams of being 1/10th the DJ he is? It’s like Michael Jordan running over and asking you to teach him that crossover or something. It’s mind blowing. He didnt have to do any of that stuff and he did. I still to this day can’t believe he’s gone. He’s one of my heroes and will be forever.

It’s cheesy but i’m gonna end with a quote because I feel like this speaks on the situation

It doesn’t matter how much or how fast you teach. The true measure is how much students have learned.

In his 36 years AM left EVERYONE he encountered with a gift. I can only hope to do the same.